by Laitaine

Disclaimer: Star Trek: Voyager and all associated characters and places belong to Paramount.  No infringement on trademarks and copyrights was intended.  This was written purely for entertainment and not for monetary gain.  Do not archive without permission and keep my name attached at all times.
Summary: Kathryn, Chakotay, B'Elanna, Tom, Seven and the Doctor play Monopoly.
Rating: PG-13
Content: Janeway/Chakotay, Paris/Torres, Humour
Author's Notes: This is very silly, and not one of my better fics, but here it is.
Feedback is very gratefully received at
Copyright © Laitaine 4th August 1999

"What is the purpose of this... game?" Seven asked, confused.

"You have a little fun, Seven.  And deal with old Earth money.  Dollars," Kathryn explained.

"Fun is irrelevant."

"Oh, not this again!" B'Elanna exclaimed loudly.

Seven ignored her.  "And how do you play this... game?"

"Well, first you choose a piece."

"A piece?"

"One of those silver things in the box," Chakotay pointed out helpfully.

As he said this Kathryn grabbed the dog.  "What?" she asked as the other five players gave her puzzled looks, "I'm always the dog."

No one looked very surprised.

Tom selected the car.  "One of these, Seven."

"I see now.  Thank you."  Seven reached to take the car from Tom's hand.  Tom withdrew it.

"You have to choose a piece from the box, Seven.  I'm the car."

"I wish to be the car."

"I'm the car.  Why don't you be the shoe?  The shoe is nice."

"If the shoe is nice then you should have the shoe."

"But I don't want the shoe.  I want the car, I got it first."

"Very well, I will be the shoe, unless anyone else is always the shoe," Seven remarked.

Kathryn smiled and tried not to laugh.  One look at Chakotay and B'Elanna told her that they were in much the same position.  The Doctor, however looked confused and Tom looked smug.

Everyone else chose their pieces, B'Elanna took the ship and Chakotay took the hat, leaving the Doctor with the iron.

"Anyway," Tom started explaining again, "Then the money is dealt.  Each player gets the same amount to start with."  He gestured toward Kathryn and B'Elanna who were busy counting out the money.

"Its 2 500's isn't it?" Kathryn checked.

"I thought it was 3," B'Elanna told her.

"Are you sure it's not 2?"

"I don't know? Chakotay, how many 500's does everyone get?" B'Elanna asked her friend.


"Thanks," Kathryn and B'Elanna said together.

"Then you shake the die," Tom was cut off.

"Dice, the plural of die is dice," Seven corrected him.

"Sorry, then you shake the dice and..." Seven cut him off again.

"I thought die were rolled not shaken."

"Whatever.  Ok, you roll the dice and move the number of spaces shown.  If you get double you roll again.  If you land on a community chest or chance square you pick up a card and do whatever it says on the card.  If you land on a property then you can buy it.  If someone has already bought it then you pay him or her rent.  See how they're coloured, well, if you have all the properties in a colour group then its called a monopoly and then the rent goes up and you can build houses so the rent goes up even more.  The aim of the game is to make all the other players bankrupt."

The doctor, who was also playing monopoly for the first time, chimed in.  "I'm a doctor, not a property magnate!"

"You are today, Doctor," Kathryn told him.

"I believe I understand," Seven stated.  "I will start."

She took the dice and rolled them.

About an hour later all of the properties had been bought.  And true to his word, the Doctor did not prove to be a property magnate, having only 2 properties, both mortgaged, and little money.

Seven landed on Park Place that was owned by B'Elanna, who also owned Boardwalk and had erected 3 houses on each.

"That's $1100, Seven," B'Elanna told the ex-Borg happily.

"But I do not which to stay."

"Deal with it, you owe me $1100."

"I will pay $600."

"No, $1100.  You don't barter, you pay."

"This is a stupid game," Seven said grumpily, handing over $1100 to B'Elanna.

Next it was the Doctor's turn.  He had the misfortune to land on Atlantic Avenue.  Kathryn grinned.  She had all three yellow properties and each had a two houses.

"$330 please, Doctor."

"I do not have that much," the Doctor told her.

"Then you're bankrupt," Tom pointed out.  "You have to give the Captain all your money and your properties."

The Doctor handed it all over unwillingly and then stood.  "Computer, transfer EMH program back to sickbay," he ordered and he left.

Kathryn's smile was huge.  She had acquired from the Doctor the third red property and a station.  Good news, since she had the other two red properties and B'Elanna had the other three stations and lots of money.  Both new properties were quickly un-mortgaged.

Next it was Tom's turn.  He looked at the board and saw that Chakotay's green properties all had nice little red hotels on them and he was more than likely to land on one.  He also saw that Chakotay seemed to be paying the Captain a lot of attention and did not have his full concentration on the game.  He turned to B'Elanna, who was sat on his left and therefore had the turn after him.  "B'Elanna, I'll give you twenty for a quick shake," he whispered while Kathryn un-mortgaging.

B'Elanna stared at him.  "What did you say?" her tone of voice was low and dangerous.

"I'll give you $20 if you shake the dice quickly after my go if I land on one of Chakotay's green hotels," he explained his meaning quickly, eager to get B'Elanna calm again.

"Oh.  It's a good thing that's what you meant or I'd...."

"You'd rip my heart out and eat it raw, I know.  So, what do you say?  Do we have a deal?"

"Only $20?"

"OK, $30 then."

"Up a bit."

"OK, how about $50?"

"$100, or no deal."


"$100, or you pay Chakotay however much he wants."

"OK, $100 it is," Tom agreed, thinking it better to part with $100 than over $1000.

Tom rolled the die and landed on Bond Street.  'Shit,' he swore silently as he slipped B'Elanna her $100 note, promised, hoping she would keep up her end of the bargain.  She did.  B'Elanna quickly rolled the die and moved her ship.  She landed on 'Go'.

"Yay!" she exclaimed.  "$500!"

Chakotay tore his gaze from Kathryn, who had been watching the bargaining and money changing hands with amusement, and looked at B'Elanna.  "Tom hasn't had his go yet though."

Kathryn giggled.  "He has."

Chakotay looked at the board and saw where Tom's piece was.  "But..."

"No buts, Chakotay, it's too late.  Now can I have my $500?" B'Elanna extended her hand.

"Damn," Chakotay said, handing B'Elanna her money.

Chakotay threw the die, doubles, and landed on the square before free parking, which was very full.  He groaned.  "Damn."

B'Elanna grinned.  "Chakotay, this game brings out the worst side of you!  Two 'damn's' in less than five minutes!"

"Ha, ha, very funny, B'Ella.  You're one to talk.  I think that engineering is subjected to more abuse everyday than any other ship is in its entire service," he shot back.

"But I swear in Klingon, so no one understands it."

Seven spoke up.  "I have a knowledge of Klingon from my time as a drone," she told them.

B'Elanna glared at Seven.  "Just be quiet for a minute, please."

Seven knew better than to argue with B'Elanna and so kept her mouth shut.

"You should swear in Klingon too, Commander.  Then it would be alright," Tom teased.

B'Elanna hit his arm hard.  "Ouch, B'Elanna, that hurt."

"It was meant to."

Chakotay took advantage of their fighting to have his second throw. He threw the die and landed on chance.  He picked up the card, groaned and showed it to Kathryn.  It read 'Advance to Boardwalk'.  He moved his hat and handed Kathryn the die.  "Kathryn, please throw quickly."

"Oooo, I sense a conspiracy."

"Just throw the die, Kathryn."

"Seven said the plural is dice."


"For a price."

"We'll settle later, just throw!"

Kathryn ginned and decided to give in.  She threw the die and landed on Free Parking.  Smiling widely she collected her money and wafted it in front of Chakotay's face.  He grabbed for the money but Kathryn pulled her hand away so it was behind her, leaning back on her free hand.  Chakotay leaned forward, reaching for her hand, their bodies scant centimetres apart.Chakotay smiled wickedly and Kathryn matched his grin.

"Children, children," Tom said patronisingly. "Play nicely."

"We are playing nicely," Chakotay and Kathryn replied in unison.  Nevertheless Chakotay moved back, letting Kathryn sit up also.

B'Elanna noticed that she too had been had.  "Seven, cover your ears," she told the puzzled woman.

Seven did as she was asked, somewhat confused.

B'Elanna swore in Klingon and then indicated that Seven could remove her hands from her ears.

Some time later it was just Kathryn and B'Elanna battling it out.  Seven had retired to her cargo bay or Astrometrics, they weren't sure which, and Chakotay and Tom were watching the game.

"Come on, its getting late.  Can't we say that it's a draw?" Chakotay asked, getting slightly bored of watching and not playing.

"No!" was the instantaneous reply he got from both women.

"Ok, ok, I'm sorry."

Five minutes later Tom tried.  "Why don't you stop, count up property and houses and hotels and money and declare a winner."


"Forget I said anything."

"Kathryn, its almost half eleven.  You're on duty in just over 8 hours, during which time you have to get some sleep."

"I've got a meeting with Tuvok at 0700 and then with Neelix at 0730, so I've actually got 7 hours," she corrected him, still concentrating on the board.

That approached hadn't work either.

"Come on, B'Elanna. Don't you that warp core thingy tomorrow?"


They continued playing.

Unbeknownst to each other, Tom and Chakotay tried the same tactic.

Kathryn suddenly felt something soft and warm touch her leg.  It began to move up and down and she realised it was Chakotay. Well, she hoped it was Chakotay.

"Come on," Tom said. "Can we just go?"

Both women stood up.

"I guess so."

"Yeah, I'm tired anyway."

"Finally," Chakotay exclaimed.

B'Elanna and Kathryn started to tidy away the monopoly set before Tom pointed out that it was a holoprogram and so they didn't need to.

"Computer, end program," B'Elanna ordered the computer, and their surroundings were replaced with the hologrid as they headed for the door.

When they reached her quarters, Kathryn pulled Chakotay inside.  "You know, you never did pay me for rolling the die to stop you paying rent."

"Didn't I?" Chakotay asked innocently.

"No.  What are you going to do about it?"

"I'm sure we can think of something."

"I'm sure we can..." Kathryn could say no more as Chakotay's lips descended on her own and they met in a tender kiss that rapidly grew deeper and more passionate.

Lack of oxygen forced them apart.  "Does that make us even?" Chakotay asked breathlessly.

"Nowhere near...."

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